Now HERE is what I was looking for.  A dark amber, full bodied, sweet warming beer with a smooth taste.  No funny-business here, this is exactly what I wanted.  After Googling Oktoberfest pictures, I saw lots of images of people enjoying this beer.  If it was good enough for them, it had to be at least on the right track.  I may buy several hundred cases of this and never leave the house.  I will need a vast supply of sausages to grill and chickens to roast.  And I will need to learn those fancy drinking songs.

I'll be the first to tell you that I've never really identified with the German side of my heritage, even though I am more than half.  But this.  This is helping.  Thank you, fine people at Paulaner.  I'm starting to feel German.